I’ve gotten into the habit of using my personal Facebook account as my voice instead of my blog, and that needs to get rectified. I want to share my thoughts and ideas with the world not with a limited group of friends!
One of the things that has crossed my mind lately is how awesome I feel in my skin. I’ve had a lot of personal road blocks this year, but right now I am in such a good place I need to share it with you all. I found my goal has slightly changed as far as my clothing size. Naturally, I’d like to feel lighter, stronger, and ultimately reach a healthier weight goal, but I also realized that losing more weight may hinder the natural curves of my body. In the past when I’ve gone down one pant size lower than my current size 16, my ass got lost. I have such a larger bone structure that I literally have to lose my ass to fit into a size 14. I can feel my sit bones protruding and it’s actually uncomfortable sitting on hard surfaces. If anything, I should maintain my booty for seat comfort alone! I’m hoping glute exercises will help me keep the meat on the bone as I continue on my journey, but it seems when I get to a certain point of losing weight my body pulls from the areas I quite rather appreciate, like my derriere. Does it pull fat from the rolls in my belly or my double chin, not so much! But, I digress, that is a subject for another post entitled “Embracing the Rolls!”.
So for now, I’ll keep up the regular exercise and well as drink a milkshakes every so often to make sure I keep my curves nice and full.
Another reason I’m enjoying this time to maintain my shape while sharpening up the curves a bit with some yoga/cardio/pilates 3-4x per week, is because I’m wearing the perfect clothing size for a woman who loves to shop. I’m 5’9″ and wear a size 14/16 in plus. I also wear a L/XL in non plus sizes (depending on the store). This is an awesome size to be because I get to shop IN BOTH WORLDS. I get to wear clothing especially made for larger curvier ladies at Plus Size stores, as well as the higher end sizes at non-plus sized stores. It’s quiet magical to say the least. I truly do find some items that fit me well at shops like NY&Co., H&M, Kohl’s and TJ Maxx since they carry up to XL as well as some plus sizes, but I tend to shop at more plus size specific stores like Lane Bryant because the clothing really caters to my curves. (Please see my Curvy Fashion Page for a list of Plus Size friendly stores.)
I recently invested in the Scalloped Boudoir Lace Dress in size 14/16 from Kiyonna, a high end plus size designer, to wear to a wedding last November in Manhattan. Kiyonna’s designs are not cheap but they are simply stunning as well as durable and well worth the cost. She is actually one of the only plus size designers who starts at size 10 instead of 12, which reaches a wider range of women but ultimately leaves out sizes lower than a size 10. I wore this dress to two Halloween parties as well as the intended Manhattan wedding and I’ve gotten wonderful and genuine compliments on how classy and well made it is for my shape.
Needless to say, I got my damn moneys worth out of that dress. I’ve been asked where I purchased the dress as well as the designer, both in person an on Facebook, by numerous women. Being one who is not ashamed of being a plus size lady, I simply tell the gals who are clearly not more than a size 8 that it’s from Kiyonna, a plus size designer for sizes 10 and up. I do feel bad if it’s not available in their size, then I think about the clothing items I find online and in stores that only go up to a Large and I know by the cut I will never be able to squeeze my T&A in that item. C’est la vie!
So, let’s wrap up. Where am I on my journey to Health and Wellness? Well, I’m taking some time to maintain my weight and health where it is now. I’m not going to obsess over losing weight, even though I’m only half way to my “set” weight goal. I feel if I can maintain at the half way point and find it’s not the end of the world difficult, then when I do reach my goal I won’t sabotage myself like I have in the past. My tattoo artist (he lost 100 pounds!) gave me some advice regarding my journey to health & happiness. His advice was NOT to set a weight goal and just do your thing, be healthy, be active, until you feel you have reached your goal. For some of us, that sounds awesome and for others it sounds like a train wreck. You know you. You know if you need structure, goals, a plan or if you can change your mindset for the better and ride it out until you find your healthy weight. I’ve gone the regimented plan before and it works only temporarily for me. Once I hit that goal, I seem to self-sabotage in order to find that other “goal” I need to reach. Maintaining is not fun for me. There is no prize at the end, except perhaps living a longer healthy life and not feeling like crap. But that’s apparently not enough for me! So we’ll see if having no goal in the back in my mind (for now) is either worse or better. Commence Happy & Healthy Kate Experiment #53983404.
I’m still leading an active life, I’m not counting calories or cutting back on any certain food, but I’m just trying to be more aware of portion control and what my body is telling me. Do I still overeat? Yup. Especially with the holidays surrounding me. But as weird as this sounds, I don’t overeat as much or as often as I used to and to me that’s a small victory. I’ve also realized a setback won’t be as huge in my crazy mind as if i was trying to lose weight. Maintaining is just as challenging as losing weight for someone who has struggled with the scale their entire life, so once I master the art of maintenance I think I’ll finally have the knowledge I’ve been lacking in the past throughout my yo-yo dieting to finally live life at a healthier weight, whatever that may be.
Focusing on strength instead of weight has also really helped my overall mindset regarding my health. On some level it feels great to fit into a lower dress size, it shows your hard work is paying off, but for me I’m at the point where I am OK with the number printed on my clothes. Why? Because I feel healthy, I feel great in my clothes, and I look damn cute.